


Candlelight

by PirateLama



Category: Assassin's Creed - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Assassin's Creed Spoilers, Eivor loves Ceobert like a son, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Grief/Mourning, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Male Eivor (Assassin's Creed), Pre-Relationship, Spoilers, mention of past character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-22
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:42:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28227825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PirateLama/pseuds/PirateLama
Summary: "Eivor is back in Tamworth again. He can’t seem to stay away.He knows he has to let it go, but he doesn’t know how. The pain, the emptiness is ever-present in his heart. He fears nothing will ever be able to make him whole again."After all the loss, Eivor comes back to the final resting place of a loved one.(Spoilers for the entirerity of Assassin's Creed Valhalla.)
Relationships: Eivor/Vili Hemmingson
Comments: 6
Kudos: 50





	Candlelight

**Author's Note:**

> Careful before proceding : this fic contains spoilers for the entirerity of Assassin's Creed Valhalla (all conquest of England, Asgard arc, Sigurd arc).
> 
> See the end notes for trigger warning.

Eivor is back in Tamworth again. He makes a stop every time he passes through Ledecestrescire. Every time he travels north of Ravensthorpe.

He can't seem to stay away.

He knows he has to let it go, but he doesn't know how. The pain, the emptiness is ever-present in his heart. He fears nothing will ever be able to make him whole again. Not after Brothir, Soma, Hunwald, Ubba, Hjorr - every time someone leaves him, it reopens the one wound that seems to never close, and empties him a little bit more. It makes the illusory Valhalla _oh so tempting_.

He stands in front of the stone sarcophagus. A candle lit on the top of it - Ceowulf explained it to him once. It's how christians talk to their god when they don't have the time. The candle is a continuation of the prayer, it keeps the intention alive as long as it burns.

As long as Ceowulf lives, there will always be a candle burning for Ceolbert.

Eivor doesn't know the christian god. He doesn't always understand what is considered sinful or virtuous. But he talked with Deorlaf of christian Heaven and Hell, the realms for the good, and the wicked. And he hopes, desperately, that this Heaven exists, and that Ceolbert has been admitted there. Because Ceolbert isn't in Valhalla, and any other alternatives are unbearable to imagine. He deserves a good afterlife, even if he didn't die on the battlefield.

He probably wouldn't even enjoy Valhalla, gentle as he was.

So Eivor hopes.

Ceolbert was a good person. He was gentle, honest. These must be christian values, surely? But what if keeping company with pagans was enough of a sin to forbid him entry into Heaven? The christian god was supposed to be loving and forgiving. But maybe not every sin was forgivable? Who could tell? Not even christians seem to agree on what was or wasn't important to their god. How could Eivor know?

  


He is kneeling among the flower offerings at the base of Ceolbert's final resting place. He doesn't know when the tears came, but now they can't seem to stop. He is curling in on himself, despair clawing in his heart. He sobs. He had forgotten how to.

It's too much loss, too many deaths for him to bear. He doesn't know how to get up, how to keep going after this.

He is a drengr, a jarl, _Odin reborn_ , and all his strength has left him. He doesn't know if he'll ever get back up.

  
  
  


Vili enjoys Ledecestrescire. The hills are green, the wind soft and the sun warm. After every trip north, Eivor always comes back to spend a day in Tamworth fortress. The view of the region is unmatched. Vili sometimes climbs atop of the longhouse, straddles one of the beams, and simply enjoys the panorama.

He wonders sometimes why Eivor always comes back to this place. At first, he thought it was to talk to the Mercian king, but things pretty much run themselves nowadays. Then he thought of a lover maybe, but Eivor never looks satisfied after they leave. If anything, he looks sad. Like he is leaving a piece of his heart behind. Maybe a secret child? Someone he can't bring back to his clan, for one reason or another.

Vili hopes Eivor will trust him with this secret someday.

  


He saw Eivor enter a small stone building behind the longhouse some hours ago, and he hasn't come out yet. The sun is getting low on the horizon, and the cold will soon start to set in. He knows if he wants to get drunk with his oldest friend, he'll have to drag him to the alehouse. So he comes down from his perch and goes to the building he saw Eivor enter.

As he gets closer to the door, the world around him seems to quieten. The wind stops, the voices from town are faraway. He is almost afraid of making a sound, as if he is walking on sacred ground.

He knocks on the door, hesitant. When no one answers he opens it, entering the crypt.

He doesn't immediately understand what he is seeing. At first, he thinks Eivor is meditating. He is kneeling on the floor, head bowed. But his shoulders are too stiff, his head too low.

"Eivor?" He closes the door quietly. Something is wrong, but he doesn't know what yet.

Eivor doesn't react to his words, but he does react to his touch. As Vili gently grabs his shoulder, Eivor seems to come awake. His head snaps towards Vili as if expecting an attack, but instead of defending himself, he looks defeated. Like death could come for him, and he wouldn't even fight it.

His friend's eyes are red, and his cheeks damp. He never saw Eivor like this. Sad and grieving, yes, but never like this. Never this hopeless.

"Eivor, what is it ?" He feels helpless, doesn't know how to help him. But Eivor was there for him when his father passed. He has to at least try.

He kneels on the floor, turning Eivor so they face each other, keeping a hold of his shoulders. Eivor is looking straight at him, eyes glossy from newly shed tears.

"Tell me, please."

Eivor stays silent, words failing him still. So Vili pulls him in, tucking him in his arms.

He forgets sometimes how much smaller Eivor is. When he is fighting, whether with steel or words, he towers over friends and foes alike. But here, curled in Vili's arms, he looks small, almost fragile. Physical strength and charisma are of little use when the heart weeps. Vili knows.

They stay that way for a while, dusk fading into night, the single candle standing on the sarcophagus as the only source of light.

"Vili, I - " Eivor's body starts shaking with sobs, words falling brokenly from his mouth. "He is dead, he is dead, everyone keeps dying, but I'll never see him again -"

So this is a tomb. He cannot help but wonder who is this man Eivor weeps for? But jealousy has no place here, not when Eivor is in such distress.

"- because he'll never go to Valhalla, he was a christian, and he died without his weapon."

Vili gently cards his fingers through his friend's hair. Clearly, this has been weighing on him for quite some time. Probably since before they found each other again. So he waits patiently for his breathing to return to normal.

"Who was he?"

"Ceolbert. Mercia's aethling. He was barely seventeen winters old, you know? He was gentle, kind. He was on his way to becoming a man. A good man. And he died."

"You loved him."

"He was -" Eivors trembles as he utters his next words, voice breaking. "He was like a son to me."

Vili pulls him in tighter. He cannot imagine the pain Eivor feels. But he saw parents lose their children during wars and raids. He saw how it tore their heart apart, some light gone from their eyes, never to be seen again.

"He was betrayed by a friend. I avenged his death. I lost both of them that day. Both were denied Valhalla." Eivor curls in on himself again, withdrawing from him. "All the people I hold in my heart slip through my fingers, leaving forever."

Vili retreats just enough to slide his hands to Eivors's face, gently but firmly guiding him so they face each other again.

"Eivor, do you remember what you told me after I lost my father?" Not receiving an answer, he repeats the words that saved him, months ago. "You are surrounded by those who love you. That will not change unless you push it all away."

Eivor looks at him, lost, longing and despair in his eyes. Vili cups his cheeks in his hands.

"You are loved, Eivor. By more people than you know." He needs to say his truth while he can, before fear stops his tongue again. He presses their foreheads together, closes his eyes.

"I am not leaving you, Eivor. We were apart for far too long. I'm never leaving again. And I swear, should you die first, that I'll make sure to die the same way as you. That way, I'll follow you wherever you go. Be it Asgard of Niflheim, I will follow you."

Eivor looks at him, hope lighting in his eyes. He slowly moves forwards, brushing their lips together. Finally, his muscles loosen, his face softens.

Eivor is both crying and laughing. His hands come up to Vili's. He noses Vili's wrist, sighing.

"Why is it, we can only find each other when one of us is grieving?"

"Because we are both imbeciles when it comes to matters of the heart, I believe."

  
  


**_Epilogue_ **

Eivor enters the chapel. After talking with Deorlaf again, it felt right to give Raventhorpe's christians their own place of worship. Moreover, seeing jarl uses it once in a while only makes them feel more welcomed in the settlement.

Eivor prays to the christian god now. Not often. Not fervently, nor reverently. Only for the christian friends he lost. Short prayers, asking their god to keep them safe in Heaven.

And a longer one, for Ceolbert. With a candle, to keep the intention alive even when Eivor is away.

As long as Eivor lives, there will always be a candle burning for Ceolbert.

  


He leaves after a few minutes, heart lighter. The spring wind carries his worries away, dries the few escaped tears.

He sees Vili outside, playing with Chewy and the children. Ready to whisk him away to their hunting trip. Their outing has been planned for weeks, for only the two of them.

That night, sitting close to the campfire, he swears himself to Vili.

**Author's Note:**

> I just can't get over Ceolbert's death T-T I feel Eivor is never really given the time to grieve, so it felt right to right to write a small angsty something.
> 
> But I wanted to also show that he could heal, find joy and hope again.
> 
> Trigger warning : mention of the death of Ceolbert (who Eivor loved like a son), and many other of his friends. Grief, anxiety regarding what comes after death.


End file.
